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Hogarth writes Hey Parker are you out there?
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| MB State of The Union 2004 |
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 Inspired by our President's apparent belief that, if you say something often enough it will become right and true, Editor Mitch Phillips plagiarizes George W. Bush's State of The Union Address to communicate with the membership of Michiganbands.com for 2004. Highlights include asking for more money without telling you specifically how it's going to be spent, promising more goods and services for Michigan bands without actually spending any of that money and asking for your participation without paying you for it. Like the current administration, we exist entirely by your continued faith in us (heavy sarcasm intended). Click "Read More" below.
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| The 12 Months of Touring – As Altered by Sonic Disturbance |
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sonicdisturbance writes  (as sung to the tune of The Twelve Days of Christmas)
In the First Month of Touring My Agent gave to me
A Chauffeur in a Tour Bus
In the Second Month of Touring My Agent gave to me
Two Artist Reps
And A Chauffeur in a Tour Bus...
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| Dear Santa, This is Jimmy from the band... |
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 Dear Santa,
This is Jimmy from all the way out in Highland, MI. I don't usually send letters to adults I don't know (if my dad knew I was writing letters to some old dude who's into kids he'd probably bust my arm again), but I hear your the go-to guy for X-Mas presents so I figured I'd risk it. I call it X-Mas (hope U don't mind) because I like porn a whole lot better than I like church and I'm guessing you do too because of the way you dress and all. By the way, you don't want to show up at church around here dressed in a red velvet suit. You'd totally get your ass kicked. But anyway. . .Parental Discretion Is Advised before clicking "Read More" below: adult content and language
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| The Matrix, The Music: Analysis by SonicDisturbance |
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sonicdisturbance writes 
First if you read this I assume you have seen one if not all three of The Matrix movies.
I will not attempt to discuss all the philosophical metaphors strewn throughout the movies. What I am discussing is three very similar, yet very different scenes in the trilogy, one in each film and the music used in those scenes. I will start at the beginning. Recall the scene in The Matrix where Neo meets Trinity. . .
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| Orchestra & Trumpeter Joke |
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At the recording session for a lucrative and very successful
Broadway musical, a studio musician looks around in amazement as he sees an entire orchestra filling the studio to capacity.
"Wow!" he was heard to exclaim, "this must be putting two keyboard players out of work."
Click "Read More" for a raunchier music joke!
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| Humor: Garage Rock Retro-Fit |
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 Once again you find yourself marketing the wrong genre of music in the midst of the latest craze you didn't see coming; Garage Rock. Well, don't fret my faultless fad-mongers. There's still time to retrofit your band and manufacture credibility before anyone knows any better. We here at Michiganbands.com feel it our responsibility to help you exploit every trend that comes along so you too might reap the benefits of instant celebrity. We feel confident that, if you follow our suggestions, your chances of becoming a genuine Detroit Garage Band will improve exponentially.
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| Dear Strongbad, Can You Play Guitar? |
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 If you haven't seen this hilarious animation of Strongbad the alien answering a fan's e-mail who asks, Strongbad, Can You Play The Guitar?, you're missing out on one of the best laughs we've had this year. - Mitch
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12 Stories (2 Pages, 8 Per Page)
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| Michigan Business Directory |
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